Overuse of the word drama

• Posted by a hidden member.
  Log in to view his profile
  
  
  Feb 21, 2009 7:20 PM GMT

  Did you ever express your feelings to someone....or was upset.......and that person said that you were being "dramatic"? Even if you are being calm and intelligent with your concerns, they still say it.
  
  Yeah..there are people who go overboard.......but...........
  
  I'm conviinced that when someone says you are being dramatic, it is simply a code word for saying................
  
  "I don't want to talk about it"
  "It's all in your head"
  
  and they can't deal with real emotions.
  
  Not only are they dismissing your concerns, and saying that your emotions and feelings are not appreciated. or valid, but also they are discouraging further displays of feelings and communication.
  
  And they are telling you that you are a nag, or insecure.
  
  I say......press the buttons. Ask questions. Get your answers. If a person cares about you, they will answer you. If he/she tell you that you "think too much", then say......."well....you think too little".

  QUOTE REPORT SPAM
• Posted by a hidden member.
  Log in to view his profile
  
  
  Feb 21, 2009 7:29 PM GMT

  Well...I can't recall ever being accused of drama, but I follow you.
  ...calling you "dramatic" is a deflection technique.
  
  When I get fired up, sometimes my b/f will put his hand on the back of my neck and gently coo "mai pehn rai".
  
  .....which I think is Thai for 'shut the f__k up.'
  

  QUOTE REPORT SPAM
• Posted by a hidden member.
  Log in to view his profile
  
  
  Feb 21, 2009 7:33 PM GMT

  Holy crap dude, I hate the word drama. Whether it's from people who love drama or hate it, I hear it being used all the time. It's like an overplayed top-10 radio hit. I'm sick of it. And yes, people are too quick to label something as "drama" as a way to ignore it.

  QUOTE REPORT SPAM
• Posted by a hidden member.
  Log in to view his profile
  
  
  Feb 21, 2009 7:34 PM GMT

  If he thinks youre being dramatic then there's only one answer...your feelings for him are not reciprocal. In that moment he might be the dramatic one, you are just talking about your feelings for him in a a pleasant way and he doesn't know how to handle it. BUT, YOU start being dramatic IF after knowing that fact, you still continue showing up your feelings when he is not ready for that input.
  

  QUOTE REPORT SPAM
• Posted by a hidden member.
  Log in to view his profile
  
  
  Feb 21, 2009 7:35 PM GMT

  Beaux saidWell...I can't recall ever being accused of drama, but I follow you.
  ...calling you "dramatic" is a deflection technique.
  
  When I get fired up, sometimes my b/f will put his hand on the back of my neck and gently coo "mai pehn rai".
  
  .....which I think is Thai for 'shut the f__k up.'
  

  
  
  A "deflection technique". Those were the words I was looking for!
  
  I think your boyfriend sounds great. Sounds like he is smart enough to know when to engage you, and when to tell you to simmer down.
  

  QUOTE REPORT SPAM
• Posted by a hidden member.
  Log in to view his profile
  
  
  Feb 21, 2009 8:00 PM GMT

  Beaux saidWell...I can't recall ever being accused of drama, but I follow you.
  ...calling you "dramatic" is a deflection technique.
  

  
  
  A deflection technique -- most definitely! It's also one of the easiest ways to piss me off. It drives me up the wall.

  QUOTE REPORT SPAM
• Posted by a hidden member.
  Log in to view his profile
  
  
  Feb 21, 2009 8:04 PM GMT

  
  
  
  Not all drama is bad.....

  QUOTE REPORT SPAM
• Posted by a hidden member.
  Log in to view his profile
  
  
  Feb 21, 2009 8:12 PM GMT

  Matterych said
  
  
  Not all drama is bad.....

  
  
  
  5 minutes of life down the tubes, but totally LMAO....Jess'ca!

  QUOTE REPORT SPAM
• Posted by a hidden member.
  Log in to view his profile
  
  
  Feb 21, 2009 8:12 PM GMT

  .......the Susan Hayward of it all...
  
  
  
  

  QUOTE REPORT SPAM
• Posted by a hidden member.
  Log in to view his profile
  
  
  Feb 21, 2009 8:13 PM GMT

  It's worse if someone calls you a "dramaqueen"..It just gets used way too much!!!!!!!..

  QUOTE REPORT SPAM
• Posted by a hidden member.
  Log in to view his profile
  
  
  Feb 21, 2009 8:16 PM GMT

  
  Drama in 3...2...1...
  
  

  QUOTE REPORT SPAM
• Posted by a hidden member.
  Log in to view his profile
  
  
  Feb 21, 2009 8:25 PM GMT

  I prefer Bette..
  
  

  QUOTE REPORT SPAM
• Posted by a hidden member.
  Log in to view his profile
  
  
  Feb 21, 2009 8:48 PM GMT

  When someone uses the word "drama" I instantly think of one of those soap opera shows or TNT since they apparently know drama.
  
  FYI. You can have an intelligent and calm conversation with someone and it can stillbe drama. Everyone is under the assumption that drama always refers to something dramatic like violence. Not always. Having a BF tell you to shut "F" in another language evenif playful could spark drama.
  
  Just figured I'd point that out.

  QUOTE REPORT SPAM
• TheContempora...
  
  Posts: 98
  
  
  Feb 21, 2009 9:30 PM GMT

  KissingPro saidDid you ever express your feelings to someone....or was upset.......and that person said that you were being "dramatic"? Even if you are being calm and intelligent with your concerns, they still say it.
  
  Yeah..there are people who go overboard.......but...........
  
  I'm conviinced that when someone says you are being dramatic, it is simply a code word for saying................
  
  "I don't want to talk about it"
  "It's all in your head"
  
  and they can't deal with real emotions.
  
  Not only are they dismissing your concerns, and saying that your emotions and feelings are not appreciated. or valid, but also they are discouraging further displays of feelings and communication.
  
  And they are telling you that you are a nag, or insecure.
  
  I say......press the buttons. Ask questions. Get your answers. If a person cares about you, they will answer you. If he/she tell you that you "think too much", then say......."well....you think too little".

  
  
  
  
  I know exactly what you are talking about! You perfectly articulated why i get so frustrated when that happens.. and on top of that, you feel like even when you are talking about a valid concern, you have to stop talking about it, and you feel worse than before.. sigh..
  
  I'm going to take your advice and reply with "you think to little"

  QUOTE REPORT SPAM
• Posted by a hidden member.
  Log in to view his profile
  
  
  Feb 21, 2009 10:09 PM GMT

  I find that gays don't want to hear about what you have going on. Even if it's something you're not making a big deal out of, their attitude is "don't be so dramatic". But when it comes to their problem's, it's a crisis you need to listen too.
  
  This time last year, I was in the hospital with a heart condition, and months of debilitating heart meds after. Afterward, I would run into guys I hadn't seen in a while, who would ask what I had been up to. I would tell them about my health problem, and I could read an obvious "oh god, I do not want to hear about this" attitude.

  QUOTE REPORT SPAM
• Posted by a hidden member.
  Log in to view his profile
  
  
  Feb 21, 2009 10:31 PM GMT

  I'm with Matterych...and Olivia de Havilland isn't bad either.
  
  

  QUOTE REPORT SPAM
• Posted by a hidden member.
  Log in to view his profile
  
  
  Feb 21, 2009 10:45 PM GMT

  I think today it's easier for guys to pull the drama card and to say "oh you're being dramatic, screw this i can find someone better" so they can bail out the first time something doesn't go their way. It's actually very shallow and immature and proves that person can't handle a relationship.

  QUOTE REPORT SPAM
• Posted by a hidden member.
  Log in to view his profile
  
  
  Feb 21, 2009 11:05 PM GMT

  Sometimes drama can be productive ..
  
  sometimes drama can be destructive .. like the torment of a guilty conscience!
  
  

  QUOTE REPORT SPAM
• boilerup_82
  
  Posts: 188
  
  
  Feb 21, 2009 11:40 PM GMT

  Matterych said
  
  
  Not all drama is bad.....

  
  
  yes! i love this clip!

  QUOTE REPORT SPAM
• Posted by a hidden member.
  Log in to view his profile
  
  
  Feb 21, 2009 11:55 PM GMT

  NakedDevil saidI find that gays don't want to hear about what you have going on. Even if it's something you're not making a big deal out of, their attitude is "don't be so dramatic". But when it comes to their problem's, it's a crisis you need to listen too.
  
  This time last year, I was in the hospital with a heart condition, and months of debilitating heart meds after. Afterward, I would run into guys I hadn't seen in a while, who would ask what I had been up to. I would tell them about my health problem, and I could read an obvious "oh god, I do not want to hear about this" attitude.

  
  
  I don't know that's necessarily just gay men. I think it also depends on how well you know someone.
  
  A good friend should listen if you're having a crisis. If you're extremely upset, he may try to calm you down. Sometimes people do overreact and it's not necessarily deflection to say, "This isn't as awful as you're making it out to be" or "You're not making sense. Try to calm down a little first and then tell me about it."
  
  If you're having a true crisis and someone isn't willing to listen, then that person isn't really a good, close friend. The person may be a good chum, someone you can have fun with sometimes, but not a close friend.
  
  It's also not necessarily deflection if you call someone and he says, "I can't talk right now, but I'll call you later." As long as he does call you later.

  QUOTE REPORT SPAM
• Posted by a hidden member.
  Log in to view his profile
  
  
  Feb 22, 2009 12:41 AM GMT

  charlitos saidIf he thinks youre being dramatic then there's only one answer...your feelings for him are not reciprocal. In that moment he might be the dramatic one, you are just talking about your feelings for him in a a pleasant way and he doesn't know how to handle it. BUT, YOU start being dramatic IF after knowing that fact, you still continue showing up your feelings when he is not ready for that input.
  

  
  
  Yup. If you present a loved one with something that really concerns you and they palm you off as being "dramatic" it they don´t really care.
  
  

  QUOTE REPORT SPAM