I feel I need a bodybuilder

  • Hue_2

    Posts: 3

    Jul 07, 2019 9:06 PM GMT
    I have always been heavily attracted to tall, strong guys. Muscles are a huge physical turn on and feeling small, safe, and protected is a major emotional turn on. Even a guy with no muscle tone who towers over me (5'9) can make a huge impression and having me gawking.

    Of course, I want someone who will love me, dote on me, and support me. There is more to a relationship than just sex and compatibility is very important for long-term. I want someone who is about my age or younger, drug and disease free, shares my religious beliefs, etc. Unfortunately, I just can't seem to find someone who is serious and checks off these boxes on my list, never mind the hope that he is tall with bulging biceps and bouncing pecs.

    I want to be happy, but I don't want to settle for just whatever I can find either. I don't want to come across as desperate nor do I want to come across as overly picky. Obviously muscles can be built with time and work and I'm more than happy to finance, push, and encourage a guy to become the hulking beast he dreams of becoming. There is so much more to a relationship than just sex and all...but I'm just so hung up on the strong, masculine form and what it means to me emotionally.

    Is anyone else like this? It's more than just a physical attraction. There is a definite emotional need intertwined and tangled in it. I want to be happy and without having to choose between fulfilling emotional intimacy versus physical intimacy.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 07, 2019 11:13 PM GMT
    Not enough of these guys for everyone who wants them. If you believe you have an actual chance, you might as well buy a lottery ticket.
  • Hue_2

    Posts: 3

    Jul 08, 2019 12:21 AM GMT
    cyborg saidNot enough of these guys for everyone who wants them. If you believe you have an actual chance, you might as well buy a lottery ticket.


    Well, I was voted most likely to win the lottery in high school. icon_wink.gif

    Maybe you're a pessimist, but you are definitely not the gatekeeper of my destiny and I'm certainly not giving up.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 08, 2019 12:40 AM GMT
    Be my guest. You are free to dig your own grave.
  • Hue_2

    Posts: 3

    Jul 08, 2019 1:14 AM GMT
    You've got that right. I'm absolutely free to dig my own grave. I'm also free to believe that you understand what "resolve" is. You miss every shot you don't take. icon_smile.gif

    I'm not looking for perfection. I'm looking for a good right fit, which is far more attainable.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 29, 2019 2:22 PM GMT
    Honey, get in the line!icon_rolleyes.gif
    I am always surprised how much gay men feel entitled to have the biggest dick and the biggest muscle in the town.
    What makes you any more entitled than just another 100 entitled gay men like you out there?
  • hasher22

    Posts: 38

    Aug 05, 2019 3:20 AM GMT
    Good luck, but you're setting yourself up for a very long, near impossible search. Especially in the gay community where I can list so many stereotypes that will most likely not be in your favour.

    To raise the chances of you finding a genuine exclusive body builder partner is to be a body builder yourself, even then......
  • vanquishedang...

    Posts: 812

    Aug 05, 2019 4:59 AM GMT
    I don't really find bodybuilders attractive. I think socially we are told we have to find them attractive and so many of us do. Dont get me wrong, a fit dude that is athletic, yes!!!!!. If you want a partner that puts that much time into themselves, you need to put that much time into yourself.

    Most bodybuilders are too lumpy and gross looking in my opinion, they look like stacked turds and just not natural.

    Defined and muscular is sexy

    This is gross to me and his face looks like shit:

    7-things-anybody-can-learn-from-a-bodybu


    This is hot:

    1d58f5af85608245b8c0874c32afe3da.jpg
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 06, 2019 10:57 PM GMT
    vanquishedangelThis is gross to me and his face looks like shit:

    7-things-anybody-can-learn-from-a-bodybu


    Anyone's face looks like shit with such harsh lighting. He's actually one of the best looking pros.
  • vanquishedang...

    Posts: 812

    Aug 08, 2019 8:00 AM GMT
    cyborg said
    vanquishedangelThis is gross to me and his face looks like shit:

    7-things-anybody-can-learn-from-a-bodybu


    Anyone's face looks like shit with such harsh lighting. He's actually one of the best looking pros.


    I do not see it, even if you take off his face, his body does not appeal to me and looks unnatural. Yours in your picture is far better.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 09, 2019 1:51 PM GMT
    Everyone wants an attractive partner, whether it be a bodybuilder or a bear that pushes all their erotic buttons.

    The question is, what do you bring to the equation? The people that you're seeking (and objectifying) also have desires and standards for those that they're willing to partner with.

    Unless you're willing to put in a lot of work on yourself -- body, personality, social and professional skills, you've set your partner goals so high that you'll never achieve them. And yes, you're coming across as desperate and over picky. Lots of people will take your money and even put out for it, but they'll drop you as soon as something better comes along.

    Be realistic. Be human. Realize that in time everything fades, and that if you don't accept that, you'll be left with nothing.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 09, 2019 10:45 PM GMT
    vanquishedangel saidI do not see it, even if you take off his face, his body does not appeal to me and looks unnatural. Yours in your picture is far better.


    The same Phil Heath, with better lighting:
    440px-Phil_Heath.JPG
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 13, 2019 5:45 PM GMT
    vanquishedangel saidI don't really find bodybuilders attractive. I think socially we are told we have to find them attractive and so many of us do. Dont get me wrong, a fit dude that is athletic, yes!!!!!. If you want a partner that puts that much time into themselves, you need to put that much time into yourself.

    Most bodybuilders are too lumpy and gross looking in my opinion, they look like stacked turds and just not natural.

    Defined and muscular is sexy

    This is gross to me and his face looks like shit:

    7-things-anybody-can-learn-from-a-bodybu


    This is hot:

    1d58f5af85608245b8c0874c32afe3da.jpg


    There sure wasn't any racial undertones to this. Check your fvcking blind spots. icon_neutral.gif
  • vanquishedang...

    Posts: 812

    Aug 14, 2019 5:04 AM GMT
    wllm said
    vanquishedangel saidI don't really find bodybuilders attractive. I think socially we are told we have to find them attractive and so many of us do. Dont get me wrong, a fit dude that is athletic, yes!!!!!. If you want a partner that puts that much time into themselves, you need to put that much time into yourself.

    Most bodybuilders are too lumpy and gross looking in my opinion, they look like stacked turds and just not natural.

    Defined and muscular is sexy

    This is gross to me and his face looks like shit:

    7-things-anybody-can-learn-from-a-bodybu


    This is hot:

    1d58f5af85608245b8c0874c32afe3da.jpg


    There sure wasn't any racial undertones to this. Check your fvcking blind spots. icon_neutral.gif


    No racial anything was here, I simply used pictures I found on the internet to convey my meaning, Skin color was irrelevant (actually they both appear white to me anyway until you pointed it out). I had a crush on Michael Jackson (off the wall album), Shawn Patrick Thomas, and currently, have a Mexican fuck buddy. Asian boys are also hot. The bottom picture could have been black, Latin, Asain, and I still would prefer that body type over the other one. It is the over-muscled I do not like.

    I may be white, but I grew up in small-town conservative USA. And I have curly hair with full lips, this was enough for the locals to call me the (N) word, n*gger lips, N*gger lover, half breed, etc. As far as I know, I do not have have any African heritage, but I began telling people I did to make a point. That point was because even if I did, there was nothing to be ashamed of.

    For the love of all that is sane, stop imagining racial issues where there are none. Did you just make that assumption based on my race?

    You may not be able to fathom this, but no matter the race, looking like a mashed together ball of turds (referring to the lumpiness of his arms) is not attractive to me. Did you make this assumption due to racial undertones? check your blind spots, please.

    P.S. I also raised two black children, Anthony, and Tyrell. They are my stepsons from when I was married and they are now in Boston.
  • an597

    Posts: 1

    Aug 14, 2019 4:22 PM GMT
    cyborg said
    vanquishedangel saidI do not see it, even if you take off his face, his body does not appeal to me and looks unnatural. Yours in your picture is far better.


    The same Phil Heath, with better lighting:
    440px-Phil_Heath.JPG


    I would take him any day even in ugly lighting haha. To your post above, do whatever makes you happy. To be honest, is having muscles is not everything in life. You can also change someone if you really like that person to achieve that same strong built. Personality will go along way versus physical intimacy.
  • vanquishedang...

    Posts: 812

    Aug 15, 2019 5:36 AM GMT
    cyborg said
    vanquishedangel saidI do not see it, even if you take off his face, his body does not appeal to me and looks unnatural. Yours in your picture is far better.


    The same Phil Heath, with better lighting:
    440px-Phil_Heath.JPG


    He does look better in this picture, and his eyes look amazing, but still is not my thing.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 15, 2019 3:05 PM GMT
    an597 said
    cyborg said
    vanquishedangel saidI do not see it, even if you take off his face, his body does not appeal to me and looks unnatural. Yours in your picture is far better.


    The same Phil Heath, with better lighting:
    440px-Phil_Heath.JPG


    I would take him any day even in ugly lighting haha. To your post above, do whatever makes you happy. To be honest, is having muscles is not everything in life. You can also change someone if you really like that person to achieve that same strong built. Personality will go along way versus physical intimacy.


    I maybe in the minority, but i prefer the other picture with the bad lightning. His face was more masculine. When a guy is muscular, usually i like him with a rough face. It's very arousing for me. Think about Bobby Blake (the pornstar) for example. I would so love to kiss him !
  • Slickdog21

    Posts: 169

    Sep 18, 2019 9:54 PM GMT
    Hue_2 saidI have always been heavily attracted to tall, strong guys. Muscles are a huge physical turn on and feeling small, safe, and protected is a major emotional turn on. Even a guy with no muscle tone who towers over me (5'9) can make a huge impression and having me gawking.

    Of course, I want someone who will love me, dote on me, and support me. There is more to a relationship than just sex and compatibility is very important for long-term. I want someone who is about my age or younger, drug and disease free, shares my religious beliefs, etc. Unfortunately, I just can't seem to find someone who is serious and checks off these boxes on my list, never mind the hope that he is tall with bulging biceps and bouncing pecs.

    I want to be happy, but I don't want to settle for just whatever I can find either. I don't want to come across as desperate nor do I want to come across as overly picky. Obviously muscles can be built with time and work and I'm more than happy to finance, push, and encourage a guy to become the hulking beast he dreams of becoming. There is so much more to a relationship than just sex and all...but I'm just so hung up on the strong, masculine form and what it means to me emotionally.

    Is anyone else like this? It's more than just a physical attraction. There is a definite emotional need intertwined and tangled in it. I want to be happy and without having to choose between fulfilling emotional intimacy versus physical intimacy.



    Hey OP I'm sure you've already heard this before but the kinds of guys you're describing have A LOT of options to choose from.
    What makes a guy like you stand out? For each one of your dream guys there's at least 100 of men just like you competing for their attention.
    Do you have anything in common with these guys? The really muscular types you describe dedicate a lot of energy into their training and diet. The better looking ones have those two things on their mind every hour they're awake. The next workout, the next meal, how to get everything done in time for a full night's sleep, and etc... IMO bodybuilders are some of the hardest working and most disciplined people I know.

    From your profile.
    "I'm kinda a fairly laid back... homebody. I'm not really athletic... I'm not obese, just curvy with a few extra pounds."

    What bodybuilder do you know would be attracted to this?
    There are a lot of gays out there that think they're entitled to the attention of those muscle guys. I hope you don't fall into that crowd.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 18, 2019 9:58 PM GMT
    wllm said
    vanquishedangel saidI don't really find bodybuilders attractive. I think socially we are told we have to find them attractive and so many of us do. Dont get me wrong, a fit dude that is athletic, yes!!!!!. If you want a partner that puts that much time into themselves, you need to put that much time into yourself.

    Most bodybuilders are too lumpy and gross looking in my opinion, they look like stacked turds and just not natural.

    Defined and muscular is sexy

    This is gross to me and his face looks like shit:

    7-things-anybody-can-learn-from-a-bodybu


    This is hot:

    1d58f5af85608245b8c0874c32afe3da.jpg


    There sure wasn't any racial undertones to this. Check your fvcking blind spots. icon_neutral.gif
    Youre wrong..this guy is sweet and color blind.
  • RobHM

    Posts: 12

    Sep 23, 2019 7:33 AM GMT
    rkyjockdn saidEveryone wants an attractive partner, whether it be a bodybuilder or a bear that pushes all their erotic buttons.

    The question is, what do you bring to the equation? The people that you're seeking (and objectifying) also have desires and standards for those that they're willing to partner with.

    Unless you're willing to put in a lot of work on yourself -- body, personality, social and professional skills, you've set your partner goals so high that you'll never achieve them. And yes, you're coming across as desperate and over picky. Lots of people will take your money and even put out for it, but they'll drop you as soon as something better comes along.

    Be realistic. Be human. Realize that in time everything fades, and that if you don't accept that, you'll be left with nothing.


    Agreed

    Hey I’m kinda similar in the fact that I’m 5ft 8 and generally attracted to guys taller and bigger than me. But I’ve been with guys that are my height and shorter who have made me feel submissive so maybe you should widen your net. But if you truly like bodybuilder types then why don’t you start looking into bodybuilding? Start going to the gym and get into those circles. Then it will give you a chance to talk to the guys you’re interested in.