Why is douching so impossible?

  • closetfella

    Posts: 25

    Oct 09, 2019 1:42 PM GMT
    Am I the only person on the planet that has to douche 4-5 times to get even remotely clean?

    I've been reading a lot lately trying to get my cleansing game on point, and very often I see people claiming that douching isn't even necessary, or that they can get clean after a single rinse. WHO ARE THESE FREAKS OF NATURE??

    I always drop the kids off at the pool first. And I always feel as though I've sufficiently emptied what I can before I start cleansing. Not to be graphic or anything, but let's just say the first rinse is always perfectly opaque. It then takes 3,4,5+ more rinses to get to a point where the water comes out clear-ish. And even then there's typically still some residue, and even then there's always a 50/50 risk of something gelatinous coming out during anal.

    This problem is stopping me from having anal sex with anyone other than my rubber FWB. Am I the only one dealing with this? Is no-douche anal a myth perpetuated by bloggers and/or people who won the rectal lottery?

    Please help. Thanks icon_smile.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 09, 2019 11:19 PM GMT
    As they say, "shit happens." An occasional bit of mess can be expected by anyone fucking you. If you research this site (perhaps with google) you will find discussions of this topic years ago, wgere some guys gave detailed ibstructions on how to have an empty colon - seversl large enemas involved. Guys into heavy duty or marathon sex would go through this to be perfectly empty. If a minor rinse or two of a couple ounces isn't doing it, try changing your diet or eating times, so that you know when the (hopefully once per day) event is goig to occur. If you're not having anal sex on a daily basis, you could also try taking immodium, so that what was in your colon would be firm and douchable.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 09, 2019 11:51 PM GMT
    I think most tops know you’ll never be 100% clean. Do the best you can.

    A lot of men are horniest at dawn. Bad news, since lots of us (like me) have a full rectum at that time. I try to bottom no later than early evening (but I’m also versatile, a top as well, not fond of sh** on my dick).

    Timing in gay sex can be everything, since your body has its own schedule. And cleaning is indeed difficult. Prior to colonoscopies I’ve had to fast and take strong laxatives for days, and do lots of enemas before I was totally clean.

    It’s part of having gay sex. I always wore a condom when I was single, to keep the crap off my dick, as well as avoid possible infection. As the song goes, no one ever promised you a rose garden. Hopefully your sex partners know that, too, and also wear condoms for safe sex.
  • jocked_and_lo...

    Posts: 5155

    Oct 10, 2019 4:46 AM GMT
    The "drop the kids off at the pool first" comment was very clever. icon_lol.gif

    Your issues are more than likely related to diet habits.

    Is the residue solidly formed or is it runny and messy?

    If it's runny-like residue try eating more protein and more soluble fiber type foods like oatmeal. Eat more starches like rice. Protein sources like meats should help make your stools more solid.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 10, 2019 12:42 PM GMT
    Sometimes no enema is required but I've also known to give up after fifty times.
  • closetfella

    Posts: 25

    Oct 11, 2019 4:36 PM GMT
    Thanks for the reply.

    Puppenjunge saidAs they say, "shit happens." An occasional bit of mess can be expected by anyone fucking you.


    What's confusing and frustrating though, is that it's not "occasional" or a "bit." It is 100% of the time. 100% of the time, if I don't douche, it's a complete disaster. And 100% of the time I do douche, the first 2 rinses always come out perfectly opaque (sorry for the grimy details.) This happens regardless of time of day, what I ate, when I ate, how recently I crapped, etc.

    What's even more confusing and frustrating is that so many guys claim douching isn't even necessary. How is this even possible?? It's like for me "shit always happens," whereas for a large number of guys "shit never happens." I just don't get it.

    Puppenjunge said try changing your diet or eating times, so that you know when the (hopefully once per day) event is going to occur. If you're not having anal sex on a daily basis


    That's the other weird thing, I poop like a machine! Same 20 minute window every single day. And I always feel sufficiently empty afterwards. And yet, even if I douche 30 minutes later, it's a complete shit show (pun intended.) I've considered imodium, but I'm really not too keen about inducing constipation, especially when most guys don't have to resort to this. There must be another way.
  • closetfella

    Posts: 25

    Oct 11, 2019 4:40 PM GMT
    Art_Deco saidI think most tops know you’ll never be 100% clean. It’s part of having gay sex.


    What's confusing though, is that I have to deal with this every single time, regardless of time of day or my habits. My bum is never even relatively clean unless I have a few rinses. And yet it seems like the majority of the gay community does not have to deal with this issue.

    I understand having an incident here or there, or things not being perfectly clean, but why is my bum never anything other than a complete disaster while most men are almost always at least reasonably clean?
  • closetfella

    Posts: 25

    Oct 11, 2019 4:48 PM GMT
    American_Heritage saidThe "drop the kids off at the pool first" comment was very clever


    What can I say, gutter talk whets my wits lol

    American_Heritage saidYour issues are more than likely related to diet habits.

    Is the residue solidly formed or is it runny and messy?

    If it's runny-like residue try eating more protein and more soluble fiber type foods like oatmeal. Eat more starches like rice. Protein sources like meats should help make your stools more solid.


    Hopefully this isn't too graphic for anybody, but the "residue," as well as my daily "event," are definitely not solid. It's not machine gun diarrhea or anything, but I'd say less like a Baby Ruth and more like soft-serve. I drink multiple big produce smoothies a day, and eat a sh*t ton of vegetables. I was hoping that'd be enough fiber, but apparently not.

    So do you think more fiber/solid stools is the secret sauce I've been missing?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 13, 2019 3:38 AM GMT
    closetfella said
    American_Heritage saidThe "drop the kids off at the pool first" comment was very clever


    What can I say, gutter talk whets my wits lol

    American_Heritage saidYour issues are more than likely related to diet habits.

    Is the residue solidly formed or is it runny and messy?

    If it's runny-like residue try eating more protein and more soluble fiber type foods like oatmeal. Eat more starches like rice. Protein sources like meats should help make your stools more solid.


    Hopefully this isn't too graphic for anybody, but the "residue," as well as my daily "event," are definitely not solid. It's not machine gun diarrhea or anything, but I'd say less like a Baby Ruth and more like soft-serve. I drink multiple big produce smoothies a day, and eat a sh*t ton of vegetables. I was hoping that'd be enough fiber, but apparently not.

    So do you think more fiber/solid stools is the secret sauce I've been missing?

    Im' not a doc, but that doesn't sound "normal." Maybe see a gastroenterologist?
  • jocked_and_lo...

    Posts: 5155

    Oct 13, 2019 4:29 AM GMT
    closetfella said
    American_Heritage saidThe "drop the kids off at the pool first" comment was very clever


    What can I say, gutter talk whets my wits lol

    American_Heritage saidYour issues are more than likely related to diet habits.

    Is the residue solidly formed or is it runny and messy?

    If it's runny-like residue try eating more protein and more soluble fiber type foods like oatmeal. Eat more starches like rice. Protein sources like meats should help make your stools more solid.


    Hopefully this isn't too graphic for anybody, but the "residue," as well as my daily "event," are definitely not solid. It's not machine gun diarrhea or anything, but I'd say less like a Baby Ruth and more like soft-serve. I drink multiple big produce smoothies a day, and eat a sh*t ton of vegetables. I was hoping that'd be enough fiber, but apparently not.

    So do you think more fiber/solid stools is the secret sauce I've been missing?


    You eat healthy but it's clear why you can't get cleaned out. You want foods high in "soluble" fiber. Not insoluble fiber. Soluble fiber is found in oatmeal and bran. Like I said, try eating more starch like white rice and add more protein to your diet. You should notice it will be easier to clean out.

    My diet is pretty high in protein. I eat lots of chicken, turkey, fish and eggs. The higher nitrogen content of protein rich foods slows the movement of my waste through my intestines. This results in more water being pulled away from my waste matter so by the time I excrete it is more formed. Basically, the longer waste matter sits in the intestines the more water that is extracted and absorbed back into the body. The opposite happens when food passes too quickly through your system. Of course, it's a balancing act. When too much water is taken away from waste matter that's when a person becomes constipated which is unpleasant.

    Change your diet up and you'll be so super clean bottom superstar before you know it!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 13, 2019 3:25 PM GMT
    A way to add soluble fibre to your diet is to tske a teaspoon full of metamucil or comparable psylum product, sirred into a glass of water or juice several times a day, preferably with meals. If it shows signs of working, try more.
  • izabul

    Posts: 43

    Oct 15, 2019 4:46 AM GMT
    Puppenjunge saidA way to add soluble fibre to your diet is to tske a teaspoon full of metamucil or comparable psylum product, sirred into a glass of water or juice several times a day, preferably with meals. If it shows signs of working, try more.


    Yep. I add generic unflavored Walgreens psyllium to my protein shakes and works like a champ.

    Simply clean surface regularly with unscented baby wipes like what they sell in bulk at Costco under the Kirkland brand.

    These two steps are all I generally need.

    However, what American_Heritage said is true as well. More protein helps...

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 18, 2019 12:37 AM GMT
    If imodium is too bad for you, try eating good amounts of the guava fruit, which acts like a natural imodium.
  • closetfella

    Posts: 25

    Oct 19, 2019 7:39 PM GMT
    American_Heritage said

    You eat healthy but it's clear why you can't get cleaned out. You want foods high in "soluble" fiber. Not insoluble fiber. Soluble fiber is found in oatmeal and bran. Like I said, try eating more starch like white rice and add more protein to your diet. You should notice it will be easier to clean out...

    Change your diet up and you'll be so super clean bottom superstar before you know it!


    Awesome, thank you sir. I'll give it a shot and report back with results.
  • closetfella

    Posts: 25

    Oct 19, 2019 7:40 PM GMT
    Puppenjunge saidA way to add soluble fibre to your diet is to tske a teaspoon full of metamucil or comparable psylum product, sirred into a glass of water or juice several times a day, preferably with meals. If it shows signs of working, try more.


    Thanks. I'll give it a whirl.
  • Apparition

    Posts: 4670

    Oct 23, 2019 2:25 AM GMT
    perhaps you should try eating actual food like a normal person....
  • closetfella

    Posts: 25

    Nov 05, 2019 2:41 PM GMT
    Apparition saidperhaps you should try eating actual food like a normal person....


    Apparently produce doesn't count as food? What's your definition, McDonalds and Mac 'n Cheese?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 09, 2019 9:54 PM GMT
    I'm more happier with the Clean and Stress-Free feeling I get after I douche.
    I douche several times a few days before I get plowed (IF I will actually Get plowed, IF he shows up)
    and then I fast overnight through the day of meeting up. I never get poked on a full stomach.
    After following my own douche routine I've been barebacked 4 times by the same partner
    and I encountered no problems. But, I'm also not promiscuous, and I keep my hookups
    very far and very few in between.

    A slight mess is tolerable; after all, we're only human.
    Barebackers can expect this minor stain, but it doesn't mean bareback bottoms have the
    green light to be careless and not douche at all!

    "Oh, my hubby doesn't care if I poop just a little bi- - -" SHYADAP.
    Your hubby DOES care. He's being polite about it at first.
    Sooner or later he'll tell you in yer face that you'd better be Clean or else.

    By general consensus, we wear condoms to keep any of that funk off our dicks.
    I'm up-front first hand when I'm seeking to get barebacked or condomed.
    But in most cases I'd rather just frot and JO than penetrate.
    To each his own. But douching shows that you really care about your hygiene.

    Condom or no condom, Possible or Impossible, continue douching anyway
    to enjoy the benefits of Cleanliness.