What you dont know wont hurt you...or will it?

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 04, 2007 11:40 AM GMT
    Hey guys, just want to know what you guys think of this comment that I hear alot. "What you dont know wont hurt you" kinda similar to the proverbial "does a tree make a sound when it falls if no one is around"? I understand what the not knowing wont hurt you means, but does it mean if you doubt the sincerity of your monogamous partner should you look to see if theres something going on you dont know about, or should you trust that he is being true to you...if what you dont know wont hurt you?
  • GQjock

    Posts: 11649

    Nov 04, 2007 12:07 PM GMT
    If you trust that the man you're with truly loves and cares about you why would you need to think that he'll betray you
    If you don't trust your man thats another thing
    and if you See signs you need to be upfront about it

    but if all else is good
    another cliche'ed term comes to mind "Curiosity killed the cat"
  • Squarejaw

    Posts: 1035

    Nov 04, 2007 4:53 PM GMT
    I know more than one guy who contracted HIV from his allegedly HIV-negative, monogamous partner.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 04, 2007 5:18 PM GMT
    "...should you look to see if theres something going on..."

    This is the KEY part of that question. Or rather, the answer to your question depends critically on how you interpret this part.

    Should you keep your eyes open to signs and signals around you? Yes.

    Should you go sneaking around looking into his private things in order to try to "catch him" at things? No.

    Should you constantly put effort into having open and honest conversations with him him? Yes.

    Should you constantly ask him where he's been every minute of the day? No.

    Should you try to create an environment where he feels comfortable being open with you, and knows that he can reveal secrets to you without being slammed or judged as a result? Yes.

    Should you just assume that you have accomplished that goal? No.