• Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 14, 2007 11:56 AM GMT
    Okay fellas,

    Just putting this out there,

    These last couple of months, I have been had a sudden onset of depression/anxiety and I really don't know why. I have suffered apetite loss, insomnia, and have been having severe panic attacks.

    So strange because I have always enjoyed life, always been happy, and have always considered myself not to be the type of person to get depressed.

    I am in the process of getting help, been prescribed meds that have seemed to make it worse, but I am going to fight this the best I can. I just want to say that for those of you out there struggling with depression, man I really feel for you. Never understood it until now.

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 14, 2007 12:35 PM GMT
    First off, congratulations on coming out and recognizing this issue.

    Let me share my story. I suffered with panic/anxiety attacks for years. I would take meds (Clonazepam) when they occurred (usually too late by then). I had mood swings, trouble sleeping and lacked interested in sex.

    For years I dealt with the attacks, and then started sleeping pills. Eventually when my doctor found out how many pills I was taking she put me on
    Talking to my doctor was the best thing I did. I am on the lowest possible doss for this med. Overall it helps to relieve my anxiety/stress levels therefore I sleep better and my sex drive has doubled.

    The cause of my anxiety/stress can be caused by little things and sometimes nothing at all. My mother suffers from this as did her mother. I’ve been on effexorxr for 8 months and have not experienced a single anxiety attach since.

    icon_idea.gif My advice, talk to you doctors, talk to your friends and talk to you family. You might just be surprised on how many other people experience similar issues. I found out a close co-worker has the same issues and is on the same meds. My mother has done the same and has noticed a world of difference.

    If you need to talk in private, feel free to message me.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 14, 2007 2:59 PM GMT
    Alec, thank you so much for your reply.
    Made me feel better to know that I am not alone, I have an appointment with my doc this week, i will mention effexor and see what she thinks.

    Take care
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 14, 2007 3:17 PM GMT
    Depression is a major problem, and millions of people suffer from it. You definitely should not feel alone in your struggle. Just wanted to put that out there, and like the above poster I'd be more than happy to talk to you in private if you so wish.

    All the best,

    Just remember, eat healthy, exercise, and keep a positive attitude. Our thoughts define our mood, choose to think positively always.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 14, 2007 6:27 PM GMT
    Like Alec, effexor made a huge difference in my general well-being. No more racing thoughts at night - I just drop off like a rock.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 14, 2007 7:00 PM GMT
    I've been on effexor in the past . . . helped some, but currently on Neurontin and it's awesome. Have to take it 3 times a day, but it works well for the panic attacks and anxiety.
    You are awesome to face it and deal with it! I waited a long time to deal with it, but when I could admit that it was messing up my life . . . it's only gotten better and better.
    Psychotherapy helped too!
    Good friends help as well!
    Good luck, keep in touch, you aren't aloneicon_exclaim.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 14, 2007 7:18 PM GMT
    My only regret about effexor was not going on it sooner...sure it has side effects, but it beats feeling like crap!
  • NickoftheNort...

    Posts: 1416

    Nov 14, 2007 7:41 PM GMT
    As for the recommendation of keeping a positive attitude:

    Rather than trying to keep a positive attitude (which can result in self-destructive feelings of disappointment if you fail at it), try to differentiate yourself from the self-destructive thoughts and perspectives that your depression brings to you.

    Recognizing yourself as a person outside of your depression and that your depression and its entourage of thought patterns are an invasive imposition rather than who you are / want to be is crucial.

    I have no experience with anti-depressants as I have not taken out a prescription on any them. I work against my depression on my own with my mind; it's not an approach I will recommend to anyone else, but it is the one I take for the time being.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 14, 2007 8:05 PM GMT
    Dude, Let me tell you I’m very sympathetic with you…I think only people that have lived or experienced the lost of love ones to depression can even start comprehending its horrors and implications.

    The first step is to recognize that there is a problem and look for help, including medication if you or your doctor think they are necessary (you have done that! Congratulations!)…It might take several tries until you get the right medication but don’t give up, keep trying!

    Do not withdraw from everyone, try to stay active and to keep up with your responsibilities…there are support groups out there, even for queers! Read books and take good care of yourself…

    Please e-mail if you need someone to talk.
  • dhigginb

    Posts: 2

    Nov 14, 2007 8:48 PM GMT
    Hey Jbox,

    I too have experienced depression and anxiety on and off. Rather than using meds (although I have nothing against them at all), I opted to enter analysis. Indeed, the analysis I have been in for the last few years has transformed my life. I once bit my nails habitually, a symptom of underlying anxiety, but now I have broken that habit. I once had acid-reflux, which was tied to anxiety, but now I don't. And so on. If you have access to cheap therapy, then you might want to consider it as an option. It is not a quick fix by any measure. It takes months or years to understand what might drive your anxiety/depression--and it might not work at all. But besides medication, I think it another option in fighting depression.

    Good luck!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 14, 2007 9:03 PM GMT
    You don't get depressed from one day to the next... you aren't going to snap out of it either, it takes time...

    I think the smart thing to do is to try to find out what circumstances/behavious took you where you are now, that's why therapy is you can change them...otherwise you will end up depressed once again. Some people depressed themselves because it is the only way they know how to cope with reality 9or lack of it!)...don't be one of those....

    I think everyone should think of medication as a momentary "help"...something to help you out to get the chemical balance in your brain the way it is supposse to be...that's why a good dr is a around for a dr and or therapist as you would for a very expensive car or house...put the same energy and effort, we are talking here about your life, it deserves the attention!

    I think medications have room in recovery, it could save you a lot of time, suffering and even your life...but it is not the only solution and it shouldn't be your only tool.

    This is an opportunity you have to get to know yourself, to it in a wholesome way...psysically, mentally, spiritually, socially...we are all those things.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 14, 2007 9:05 PM GMT
    Check your testosterone. It starts declining at around 27 to 28, and can dramatically affect mood. Could be it's going low.


    Check your diet.

    Don't use rec drugs.

    You might be having a drug interaction too. If this was sudden onset, something must have changed.
  • SoDakGuy

    Posts: 1862

    Nov 14, 2007 9:13 PM GMT
    I've been struggling w/ depression for a decade. It really does suck and I know I wasted a lot of years in my 20s feeling sad and blue. I hate it! So, I'm now on Wellbutrin, seeing a therapist (that actually works!) and hoping to get out of Minneapolis for good. This place really has not been kind to me.

    I know how you feel. I've been there so many times, I've lost count. You'll get through it, okay?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 14, 2007 9:23 PM GMT
    man, I just read your are or have gone trough a lot of changes lately...something to think about...I do believe we need to stretch yourself to grow, but sometimes we do too much too fast...Rome wasn't build in a day!...either did my abs! LOL

    I wouldn't take meds without blood tests, a good dr should have suggested your research and get involve in your treatment, who better than yourself to look for your best interest, no one else would do a better job!

    Stay away from alcohol...and I assume that if you come to a site like this you don't do stupid drugs (I have been known for being naive!)

    SoDakGuy, I heard you man! I actually beat my depression in Minneapolis....whetever you go, there you are...we all have diferent stories but this city I can say probably saved my life!

    There are great resources here....our weather is not one of them! nice day today, isn't?!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 14, 2007 9:39 PM GMT
    Best of luck in the struggle.

    Doctor is critical. Also watch your diet. I've found not eating as healthily can cause my mood to seriously crash (I have mild cyclothemia). Try a multivitamin and make sure it contains folate/folic acid.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 14, 2007 10:15 PM GMT
    Ive set it before in the past and Ill say it again. Meds are good when you really are just past even trying to work out and get something going on for you. i have to say you should try breathing exercies and if possibly yoga or tai chi. You will feel soo amazing after words. Its helped me out the last few years.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 14, 2007 10:26 PM GMT
    Cyclothymia. Hmm. Might explain why I have been having problems with my relationship with this one person. He seems to show lots of those traits.

    Then again, I know it is dangerous to go thinking you've figured out someone else like that.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 14, 2007 10:38 PM GMT
    You guys are awesome, thank you all for your replies..

    I think I will pull through this, I have been going through a lot of sudden changes, and this med that was prescribed has had some real affects on me... I found out that one of the side affects was the urge to hurt one-seld and suicidal thoughts.. and well.....(i cant believe i just said that)

    I saw my doctor this week, got some blood tests done, and she's precribing me something different based on the results.

    But you guys have given me alot of useful advice and I thank you all..

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 14, 2007 10:47 PM GMT
    Have you altered your diet recently?

    are you a vegetarian?

    Depression and anxiety can be cause by a deficiency of B vitamins.

    Try a multivitamin, I know it has always help with my depression and anxiety.

    I have had bad reactions t the psychiatric drugs that I took. I took xanax for anxiety and it made it worse. the effect when you were on the pill was great but once you came down the anxiety was twice as bad
  • SoDakGuy

    Posts: 1862

    Nov 14, 2007 10:54 PM GMT
    If you ever feel like you want to end it all (and I pray you don't!), please call a friend of a family member.

    I almost succeeded this past Labor Day and I'm glad I did reach out for help.
  • EricLA

    Posts: 3462

    Nov 15, 2007 1:03 AM GMT
    JBox, I know where you're coming from and glad you've opened up about your depression. I know from personal experience it's far easier to retreat. I'm not a doctor, but if you're experience with depression seems sudden and unexplained, it sounds to me as if it's a hormonal imbalance, and meds sound like the way to go, especially if you're experiencing thoughts of suicide. Some of these meds take a bit of time to work, and you may have to try different drugs and strenghts. Meanwhile, I hope you know you can rely on us friends to help you with the rough patches.

    Hang in there,


    P.S. OK, a little levity here -- but when I'm depressed I just look at Chungo's profile.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 15, 2007 2:19 AM GMT
    I am impressed JBox that you can talk about your depression so openly. Between the ages of 20 and 25 I had three untreated clinical depressions. I have not told anybody this until the last year (even my partner), I don't think my family even knows (clinical depression runs in my family tree). I had every symptom you can imagine. I have never been a crier but even simple things like spilling milk on the floor would cause me to start sobbing, it was worse than any physical pain I have had. Once I accepted my sexuality the depression abated, only to return in a milder form in my early 30's (it is called loneliness I think!).

    Strangely, once I tested HIV+ I did not get depressed, I guess I had something to fight against (also I went into shock). However, the last few years I noticed my mood changing, as it turns out one of my HIV meds causes mild depression and insomnia (just my luck), so I finally consulted my doctor and am taking 30 mg. of an anti-depressant a night to help my mood and sleep. Not perfect but I am in far better shape now then I was before the pills. I hope to be off them eventually but I won't if it means going back to having no interest in life and sleeping 2 hours a night!
  • Timbales

    Posts: 13999

    Nov 15, 2007 2:23 AM GMT
    I hope you are seeking therapy or counseling in addition to the medication. See your doctor again if the medication is making you feel worse, though.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 15, 2007 5:13 PM GMT
    So does anyone else ever break down and cry for no reason? I was just laying down last night, and outta no where I just started sobbing, and I have no idea why???

    I had a real bad panic attack yesterday too, called my doctor and got her voicemail. Ughhh.. I just sat there trying to breathe and waited it out, scared the shit out of me!

    What do you do when you are freaking out?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 15, 2007 5:19 PM GMT

    Try therapy in addition to medication. It works! Hang in there.